Hello!
As you may have noticed, I have an EXTREMELY varied gallery. I often think to myself, even now, despite knowing who I am as a person, I still feel like I don't belong. My mantra has been "Define normal?" for many years now, but I still really don't feel like I fit in one place for many reasons. I'll list how this reflects my art below.

My hobbies and interests are reflected in my artwork. I draw when I can and able, when I can't, I take photographs. I take photographs of anything and everything – whatever catches my eye.

My Asian Ball Joint Dolls are my primary love for photography, but I also adore taking photographs of my horses and animals around my farm.

Music has ALWAYS been a huge factor in my life, since I was born. I've always loved violin and begged to learn when I was three when I heard Vivaldi's Winter from the Four Seasons. It is a rather sad tune and I've always loved music that is in a minor key – always. Even as the "happy, worry free kid" I was as a child, I loved this music and the sadness it evokes. (I actually used to listen to it, sitting underneath the kitchen table, pretending to die dramatically... I was a very odd kid...) This kind of music warms my soul and gives me goose bumps every time.

I dress differently. I have somehow combined Lolita/gothic Lolita, goth, other clothing I can't even describe, into one morph that I enjoy. Combining styles isn't a first, but this style I feel is me.

This brings me back to the horses. I have ridden horses since I was a child and it has always been a "thing that the blonde girls do". That probably makes no sense to anyone else but me, as I was naturally blonde myself (see, makes no sense already), but now, people like me aren't often seen around horses.

I don't feel I fit in the horse world. I love the fact I have the ultimate goth horse – a Friesian. Big, black, elegant, spunky, and gorgeous. It doesn't help that the only horse riding clothing available is often pink, blue, purple, yellow... It is rare I'll go into the store and pick up items that are "me". I have one pair of jodphurs that actually are "me" and I have red patent leather riding boots which are also "me", but that's about as "good as it gets" in that regard!

I do however feel like I belong in the horse world, obviously because I do, but also because of my disability and illnesses. There are riding programs for disabled people to ride each week as therapy, and I really enjoyed that back at my old house. I have my own horses at my house now, so I don't really want to do it here at the new town. Para-equestrian is something I'd really like to go for once my horse Quest and I are ready to compete. I'd also be happy competing against the "able bodied" people, that would be a fun challenge.

Well... Now that's off my chest, I will get to the exciting news!

I will be weaning Rembrandt off Quest THIS weekend! It was supposed to happen next month, but he sure isn't a weedy boy so will be perfectly fine. I can then start to bring her back into work so I can ride her again! For my few horse friends here, there will be a good solid week or so being on the lunge at just a walk. Gotta tone up that preggy belly and her topline.

I am so happy I get my horse back soon. I get to fit her new saddle and ride, which is the greatest feeling in the world.

In two weeks I'm getting some news that will make or break me, so it will be wonderful to be able to go have a ride out of happiness, or go for a ride to cheer myself up. I can't wait but really dread the news that's to come.

I'll be sure to get a parent to video and or take some photos. I have a dressage clinic coming up (should all go to plan) so that will be a lot of fun.

My last bit of good news is I have officially lost just about all the medication weight I wanted to. In total I've lost 23kg and I am SO proud of myself for doing this. I haven't been able to do any exercise due to disability and illnesses so this is enormous. Quest has been a solid goal – be lighter for her and look good in your jodphurs! So happy this worked out at least!

So yes, I feel ALL my hobbies conflict with each other, but just like my clothing, I have somehow managed to morph them all into one, and that "one" is me.

Define normal?

Good to get this all out! Thank you to whoever got through it all <3

ALSO - one of my good friends from one of my high schools is coming to stay with me for a week! He moved back to England and I've missed him heaps, so it will be awesome to have him here! I think we'll be driving really fast on the John Deere Gator hahaha. Best thing we own on the farm <3 (apart from the horses I suppose lol)

© SARAH VAFIDIS
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